Monday, April 20, 2009

Grocery Store Blues

I went out to buy groceries today. I'm actually going to make dinner, meatloaf. I've always liked meatloaf, but I didn't have all the ingredients I'd need to make it, primarily, the meat. It was weird buying all the stuff. Dry Mustard, bread crumbs. I never heard of dry mustard before, but yes, the grocery store carried that. And who knew there were such things as Graham cracker crumbs. When I found the Graham Cracker crumbs, the box had a picture of a cheese cake. So now I know what you use that stuff for. I mean, I've heard of Graham Crackers, but Graham Cracker crumbs? Of course, it's crumbs from Graham Crackers, duh, but to actually have a box of that stuff, wow. Bread crumbs I've heard of before. That's the kind of stuff you use for shake n' bake. Can you believe it? I'm talking recipes here.

The grocery store wasn't crowded but there was the occasional mother with child. One of them appeared to following me. Of course she wasn't. We just happened to be going down the same aisle. I proved my theory by going to another aisle. The lady didn't follow. Some older lady was hogging up the meat aisle. I saw some firemen make it through and grab their meat. I managed to grab my ground beef when she moved aside a bit. Didn't want to tell her to move. Didn't want to talk to anybody. Just wanted to grab my shit and get out. Like a drug dealer before getting caught by the cops, except in this case, the cops are everyone in that store. Plus old people don't move. They own the joint, so you let them have their space. Besides, if it were prison, you wouldn't shove them aside, unless you wanted to be fucked up the ass. They've been fucked up the ass longer than I have, so now it's their turn or boy they have a strong grip. This is before they take viagra.

So I end up in the grocery aisle and one lady comes behind me. Her husband is there. I don't want to say their losers, but they had the whole grocery shopping look. They too wanted to get out of there, except in this case me and the other lady in front of me were holding up the line. It wasn't bad though, could've been worse. It's always worse in the express lane. Sure it's fast, but the attitude with the people in that line is that it's too slow. Which is why I go in the regular lanes. I don't need that shit, I really don't. I'm just a guy trying to get stuff to make his meatloaf.

The cashier was nice to me and had a warm smile. The bagger appeared soft and gentle, gentle enough that he'd probably hug me. Something I could use. That's what I always looked forward to from Corrie. Whenever I would see her, she was hold me and clutch on to me like there was no tomorrow and I liked that feeling because I'd do the same with her. I considered her my sponsor, my sort of guardian angel. She's hardly around though. Haven't seen her in months.

MJ, yes, is one of those online people, but we've hung around physically. She lives in another town, a better town I think. Though there's that saying, the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence. Her town is quiet, less selfish, more accepting. Could be what I see though, not what actually is, I don't know.

Groceries in hand, I'm heading home and some lady is hanging off to the side like a hooker in daylight except she doesn't have on slutty clothes. She's just there and I wonder if she's one of those survey/quiz people that stop you on the street to see if you have time to take a survey/quiz. I have five bags in my hand, so no I don't. She doesn't stop me though, and I see, in her hand is a small purse. Maybe she's just waiting for somebody. I don't acknowledge her, she doesn't acknowledge me, it's best that way. I just want to be left alone. I don't need people pretending they care.

Like that one lady who ambushed me at work. Girl, but now a lady. Wondering why she doesn't see me anymore. Fuck, they always ambush me at work, I hate that. Why don't those idiots leave me alone? They tend to think that I don't like them or something, and 90% of the time that is the reason! My good friends don't ambush me at work.

I go to work in about 2 hours.

I wondered what my uncle would think as he's going to the grocery store. I think he'd think the same. Just to get in and get out. He's a likeable guy though.

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